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Essays In Love

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Perhaps it is true that we do not really exist until there is someone there to see us existing, we cannot properly speak until there is someone who can understand what we are saying in essence, we are not wholly alive until we are loved. I will love you not just for your wit and talent and beauty, but simply because you are you, with no strings attached.

If I could be that beacon of hope for someone, I hope that I won’t be too caught up in whether my stomach is too big or that I don’t have a six-pack. This book is for those readers wanting to be instantly immersed in the story and to learn or have someone share some universal experiences we al have in relationships.The Subtext of Seduction” and “ Authenticity” discuss our desire and frustration with our worthiness, “ Marxism” on our fear of being loved back (“ how soon their attractions might pale if they began to love us back! Then, on holiday, Chloe reveals she doesn’t like being with him anymore and has been seeing his colleague, Will. The work's genius lies in the way it minutely analyses emotions we've all felt before but have perhaps never understood so well: it includes a chapter on the anxieties of when and how to say 'I love you' and another on the challenges of disagreeing with someone else's taste in shoes. Then again, I wouldn’t say I have a lot of experience in this realm so I probably need to get a second opinion.

I also think that the resentment we feel for our lover (who is holding us back from dating others) is terrifying. That’s generally a result of one of the partners thinking the other isn’t good enough for them (because that partner thinks the other associates with “no-good” people including themselves. In his words, “ I appreciated how novels could generate emotion, moving you, perhaps to tears, through characters with some of the quality and immediacy of real-life acquaintances. There’s less of a chance to make a fool of yourself (or at least be aware of how foolish you sound) because you didn’t intend on furthering that relationship anyway. I think when relationships don’t turn out the way you want them to, it’s so easy to go back into your shell and wallow.It will make you analyse not only the way you are affecting your beloved but the 'how come' and 'why' they affect you. Alain de Botton is the author of Essays in Love (1993), The Romantic Movement (1994), Kiss and Tell (1995), How Proust can Change your Life (1997), The Consolations of Philosophy (2000) The Art of Travel (2002), Status Anxiety (2004) and most recently, The Architecture of Happiness (2006). The book tells the story of their relationship and their eventual break up when she goes off with one of Alain's work colleagues. While gripping the reader with the talent of a great novelist, de Botton brings a philosopher's sensibility to his analysis of the emotions of love, resulting in a genre-breaking book that is at once touching and thought-provoking.

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