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The Joy of Saying No: A Simple Plan to Stop People-Pleasing, Reclaim Your Boundaries, and Say Yes to the Life You Want: A Simple Plan to Stop People ... Boundaries, and Say Yes to the Life You Want

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When my father was diagnosed with bowel cancer in June 2016 after our being estranged for four years, everything I’d learned helped us have a beautiful, forgiving relationship in his final ten months. Though these kinds of roles may have gained us attention and affection, they prohibited us from becoming our true selves. Burnout is significantly on the rise, partly because we now have a word for something humans have long experienced, but also because the increasing demands of work and the difficulty of separating work from our home lives have put a huge amount of stress and fear on us about disobeying and getting into trouble. As a recovering people pleaser, I’m done with jumping through hoops trying to prove myself to unpleasable people.

35 Inspirational Quotes On Saying No - AwakenTheGreatnessWithin 35 Inspirational Quotes On Saying No - AwakenTheGreatnessWithin

It takes a toll when what you project and portray on the outside is at odds with how you truly feel on the inside. Time and again, I’ve found that saying no and figuring out what I need to say no to paves the way to something so much better. Whether overtly or indirectly, you often have an issue with saying no through your words and actions. We learn that no means no as long as it doesn’t involve hurting someone or pissing them off or being a “bad” person. PDF] [EPUB] The Joy of Saying No: A Simple Plan to Stop People Pleasing, Reclaim Boundaries, and Say Yes to the Life You Want Download by Natalie Lue.Thanks to technology, we have more of a window into one another’s lives than we ever have and numerous means to communicate, share ourselves, and connect. It’s that you’ve internalized a lot of shite along the way that’s taught and convinced you otherwise.

Baggage Reclaim Home - Baggage Reclaim with Natalie Lue Baggage Reclaim Home - Baggage Reclaim with Natalie Lue

There isn’t a tipping point of people pleasing where you finally start reaping the rewards and you’re set free to be yourself. I finally allowed myself to become a grown-up at twenty-eight, and again and again to the present day, and guess what? The mistake that most humans make is conflating boundaries with saying no, but boundaries are as much about what you say yes to. If you have a parent, friend, *someone* in your life that feels perpetually disappointed in you and maybe even feels entitled to make their feelings and issues your problem, it’s okay to say no to this malarkey.Your body has had to go to extreme lengths to stop you in your tracks or make you see what you’re carrying. Fear of dying by age forty far outweighed the potential discomfort I tended to sense in others when I so much as contemplated saying no, never mind verbalizing or showing it. Awareness of children’s rights, respect of their boundaries, and nurturance of their emotional, mental, and physical well-being are no longer anomalies ascribed to “hippie” or “lax” parenting. It’s no coincidence that I experienced tinnitus when I went through an extended period of pushing myself to attain, not realizing I was hurting myself by doing it for the wrong reasons and having little sense of my effort limits. It also wasn’t uncommon for children to raise their siblings or to even parent their parents, or to forgo an education to earn a living or be married off to someone the family could benefit from.

The Joy of Saying No - Natalie Lue - Retirement Wisdom The Joy of Saying No - Natalie Lue - Retirement Wisdom

On Boundaries“I wrote this book because I genuinely had discovered the healing and transformative power of saying no and having boundaries. Her work has been mentioned and featured in the likes of The New York Times, Washington Post, NPR, BBC, The Sunday Times Magazine, and USA Today.

This evolution tracks with what was happening in the world, including the Industrial Revolution, colonization, and imperialism.

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